Catalina, Part 2 of 2, Picture Edition

My grandma invites people to Catalina the way someone blows on a dandelion and suddenly there's a million dandelions in your front yard, on your porch, sleeping four on the fold-out couch, and you're fighting them to use the bathroom in the morning and then once you finally get in there there's no more toilet paper.

She judges occupancy not by the number of beds, but by the lengths of floor open that will hold a body. Most years in a room that sleeps 5 we've had to squeeze in at least 9 - and that's just that room, once you step out of it you'll have to dodge bodies strewn about the living room, kitchen, and onto the porch. It's like she's running her own hostel in Bratislava that doubles as a commune.

So this year, Gabi, Gige and I decided we would get our own house so that we could control the amount of people sleeping in it, and Oh My God - It was so worth it. The only people waking me up in the morning were these two, and it's totally ok because look how cute she is:

Oh, and Hailey is pretty cute too.

Seriously, she looked like that almost every moment of every day. She's the happiest baby in the world. I'm fairly certain Gige has some sort of racy drug in her breast milk and that's why Hailey is so happy. You better believe the next time I'm feeling down I'll be calling her over for a little cream in my coffee.

My feelings about this trip were pretty boring, because I had fun. (Aside from missing the P's, and SA like I'd miss a limb) There were no crazy meltdowns, or enormous family drama, or making out with underage boys - and at one point I looked around and was like, "Wait. . . Hold up. . . Is this what growing up feels like. Ew. Weird. Why aren't I hungover? How come the dishes are done? Why doesn't Gabi have a new STD?"

So here's some pictures from the trip. I'm going to try very hard to not post seven hundred of me holding Hailey.

Oops. Bad start. Ok, no more of me and Hailey I promise.

Just kidding! Here's another! I'm probably yelling about how much I love that couch. Look at it. It's the most pastel couch in the world.

The Math Teacher and Marc are trying to get their iPhones to tell them where the fun is.

Gabi also checks her iPhone for fun. Gige checks her invisible phone.

Me: "And then the bear said. . ."

Hail: "Yeah, whatever. The ending blows my mind, let's skip past all this bear bulls$%t and get to the ducks."

You can't tell from this picture, but Bub's boobs are actually way bigger than Gige's. I put one of her bra cups over my entire face the other day. It's huge.

(As a joke. Not just 'cause I go around putting bras on my face.)

We took fourteen of these types of pictures before the waiter finally asked if he could do it for us. You can tell from the following, Hailey was not pleased with how long we spent taking pictures of ourselves.

We made her sit alone. Also, doesn't it look like Gabi is doing something sneaky to me under the table, and like she is whispering through clenched teeth, "No one's ever gonna know."

Oh yeah, and like dorks we read the same book every year in a weird book race. This year is was Eat Pray Love. Last year it was Tori Spelling's STORI Telling. We're only getting smarter people. Only getting smarter. Next year it'll probably be War and Peace. In Russian. (Not a hundred percent sure that's by a Russian author. Not going to look it up either because I already have wikipedia open to dandelions, and Usher Raymond and I don't need any more tabs cluttering up my task bar.)

Look at Gabi, sunbathing in the nude like a floozy.

(She's not really naked, but somehow Gige managed to capture this in a totally awesome way.)

And I apparently grabbed a hand towel instead of a beach blanket to lay on.

Next year:

Less pictures of me with babies. More pictures of my friends looking naked.

You're welcome in advance.