They Don't Have Enough Pills In The World To Stop This Kind Of Love

Once one of my High School teachers called my mom in for a private meeting so he could bang her talk about some issues he was concerned about.

Those being mainly that he was concerned about my attention span, and thought perhaps I should get tested for ADD (that's back before they added the H) and should maybe go on drugs.

(Am totally kidding about the bang-her-line-thru thing, I just learned how to do that. Am computer genius! Can Html like a third grader!)

Her response?

"Amy, Mr. Cannon thinks you can't concentrate."

"Why?"

"Because it took you a week to fill out the months on his desk calendar."

(pause)

"How long is it supposed to take?"

"I'm guessing five, six minutes."

"Well. . .huh. He might have a point."

"Do you want to be tested for ADD?"

"No, I don't have ADD, I just hate office work."

"What were you doing instead?"

"Imagining what life would be like if My Little Pony were actual live moving ponies. And then choosing which one I would get."

"We don't have a big enough yard for a horse."

"No, it's a My Little Pony. They're little."

"Amy . . . "

"But wait - see I would make this sign in wood shop that says "Dream Valley", because that's where the ponies live, and I would hang it up over the garage where we'd keep our real life My Little Pony. And I would get somebody to sculpt little goblins and other magical creatures to get all up in Dream Valley because the ponies didn't live alone if you remember. They had magic buddies."

"You cannot nail a sign up on the garage that says Dream Valley."

"Are you sure?"

"Very."

"Do I have to be a Teacher's Assistant again next semester?"

"Not if we ever have to have a conversation like this one again."

"Deal."

Anyway, my point is - there's been a lot of talk about how I get can't focus for a long time on one specific thing. But maybe it's not attention deficient people, maybe it's just the fact that I like lots of different things. Some people call it worldly.

And I ask you - if you could love both of these men at the same time, wouldn't you also be impressed with yourself?

Brett Dennen.

Ian Somerhaljdfalsdhf.

(yes it's the same picture as yesterday. I don't care.)

(ooh just looked it up - it's Ian Somerhalder. Same thing.)

I mean - look at those two. Gorgeous.

Before you judge you need to listen to these two things. Preferably while crying. Alone. In a bathtub. With a picture of your ex-boyfriend/girlfriend just out of reach. (even if it doesn't make you sad, it might just make you mad, but it's just out of reach, and that makes you sad.) And a bottle of wine opened and floating in the new little float-y thing you bought for the bathtub. (go out and get one right now.) Ok, maybe you just need a picture of your old dog that died just out of reach. - Turn on the song. Let the beauty wash over you. Thank me with oral your smile.