Dear Tuesday, Will You Marry Me? (*editor's note: this was written for last Tuesday, not this Tuesday. Stupid flash back episode.)

And have a long happy life with me? No kids, we'll just be like one of those couples who says, "Our dogs are our kids." And we'll say things to each other like, "Have the kids eaten today?"

"I forgot to feed them."

"Honey!"

"I'm just joshin' you. Of course I didn't forget to feed our sons. I love them more than I love these fancy velcro shoes."

"You can get them on and off in a hurry!"

"Did you update our sons' facebook pages?"

"I did! They posted a photo journal of their bath time! Complete with a modesty bar!"

"A modesty bar! That's rich honey. Real rich."

"Mosey even photo shopped a shower cap on Goober's head."

"A shower cap?! STOP."

"We're so lucky to have each other Tuesday."

"We sure are honey. Us and the boys."

"We should take our Christmas photo with all of us in the tub! What do you say?"

"All of us? In the tub?!"

"Yeah!"

"Hot dog that's a good idea!"

"I'll get the modesty bars ready."



And then we'll get punched in the face by total strangers for being RIDICULOUS(ly in love), but seriously Tuesday? You're rocking my world.

Lost is back - check.

Glee steps it up and resumes kicking tv ass - check.

Lakers win - check.


And there you have it, the tv trifecta of PERFECT.

I know not everyone watches Glee or Lost, and you don't have to - Lost is almost over and I still have no f*cking clue - but Glee? Stop thinking it's gonna turn you into a Nancy boy and start watching! I guarantee you tell a girl you watched Glee last night and sang along to the library version of Can't Touch This, and you're gonna get so much geeky, innocent, you-wanna-put-it-where ass you won't even know what to do with it!!!

(Not sure why I'm directing this one at the fellas, but I am. And you're welcome.)

Not since Old School has Total Eclipse of the Heart been so good. I actually can't hear the song without singing it like the Dan Band does, which is still so funny to me, even after the four millionth time I've seen it (Turn around, bright eyes! F*ucking every now and then I fall apart!)(I'm crying from laughing as I type this)


But oh my gosh I love this! Oh, Finn, in your flannel you look so forlorn and heartbroken I just want to make you pie, and eat it while you sing to me. And new dude - I can't remember your name because I'm trying not to get attached to you because I know you're bad. You're from the rival school - but that last line at the end - yeah I want to make you pie too, and then make you spoon me.





Bonus. Because it rocks.