Monday, January 15, 2007

I Love How They're Individually Wrapped In Foil

I walked into my office at 6am today to find a group of men standing where my wall to the outside used to be. A pleasant surprise. I mean if my wall is to be replaced with something, it may as well be a line of calloused, tan men. Or a giant pyramid of Ding-Dongs. Whatever.

So that was cool, until about 6:05am when I realized it was 37 degrees at my desk and the men were not keeping the chill out as well as I would have liked. They offered to help keep me warm, but I know what that means. You can't trick me, tricksters.

The secretary leaned in my office and told me she was going to call everyone and tell them not to come in because the workers wouldn't be done for another hour. Which was really nice of her because no one besides us comes in until 9, which if my calculations are correct, will be AFTER the men are gone. I also like to wake people up to tell them things that don't pertain to them, but I typically only do that when I'm drunk, and in love with them.

"Hi."
"Who is this?"
"Lifen, I just wanted you to know that the olly reason I (*hiccup*) drove to that Starbucks is cause I hate coffee."
"What?"
"I love you."
"Uhm."
"Shhh. You should (*hiccup*) be sleeeeeeeping."
". . . Amy?"
"I think you knowed."
"You probably shouldn't drink on a school night. Pull yourself together. I'll see you in class tomorrow."
*click*
"Goodbye Mr. Welch."

High School was a rough time.

Along with calling all the other employees to warn them about the construction they will not be party to, the secretary also opened all the doors in the office to air it out - because apparently the GIANT HOLE WHERE MY WALL USED TO BE isn't breeze-y enough.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wasn't it "Sr. Welch"? The Spanish teacher/JV football coach? Or am I thinking of someone else?

Also, hooray Ding Dongs.

Anna said...

So THAT'S who the Ding Dongs were for. MMmm.

And...at least your office isn't soupy. I just hate when things get soupy.

Carrie said...

Multiple Choice:
Reading this entry made me -
a) laugh and pee
b) reminisce about my favorite Drunk Amy phone call.
c) Have to fight off an incredible urge to hop in the car and drive to Ralphs for a box of Ding Dongs.
d) All of the above.

Katie said...

You were in my dream last night. We were walking around LA, smash cut to, we were in Hubbard walking around, and I asked you if you wanted to go back to my house (in Hubbard) to watch the Sopranos. We were laughing hysterically the whole time and having a grand time.

I miss you.